Just over 40 per cent of marriages end in divorce. The average length of a marriage is 13 years, long enough to have children and have your finances completely intertwined.
So how can you avoid years of legal battles and financial ruin as well as keep your children on side?
Theoretically, the minimum time this will take is seven months. In reality, it will take longer.
If you have been married for over a year, then you can apply for a divorce online. You then need to wait 20 weeks before you can apply for a conditional order (the old decree nisi.)
If you cannot come to an agreement on your finances and child arrangements, you should use this time to start mediation.
Lawyers fees could run into tens of thousands of pounds. Mediation just costs around £2000. You can always share a lawyer! Yes really, you can.
You then have a further six weeks and one day before your conditional order can be finalised (the old decree absolute.)
Make a parenting plan – this will involve decisions such as where the children will live, who will pick them up from school, what happens at holidays and Christmas. Mediation can help you with this.
If you are really stuck on a way forward with the practicalities, you could consider living together apart, where you share the family home but live separate lives.
The Family Mediation Scheme runs until March 2026. If your dispute is about children you can get £500 towards the cost of mediation.
In effect your first mediation session is free. And your second mediation session is subsidised.